Batman: Dark Tomorrow
Batman, nannannannannanna Batmaaaan, Batman nannannannannanna Batmaaaan, Batman nannannannannanna Batmaaaan, Batman nannannannannanna Batmaaaan. For those who hasn’t got it yet, the following words will be about the game Batman: Dark Tomorrow. A must-have or just another miss-used movie-license? Or in the case of this piece of software the question should be: a game of just a program made to annoy you? (PS its the last thing).
When you start the game you get to watch an intro that tells you the story of batman. Your parents are killed when you were young and 20 years later you are Batman, a guy running around in Black thights to help old lady’s to cross the streets. This introduction is brougt to you like in a real movie, during the movie the credits roll over the screen. I reminds me of the beginning of Mafia but only worse.
The story of the game is a brand new in which you meet all your favourite enemies such as the Joker. It is rather banal and ain’t used to add an extra dimension to the gameplay, it’s just something inferiour used to justify the gameplay. It’s rather worthless, it happens too often that you don’t know what to do and even most of the “brainless” shooters have nowadays a storyline.
Let’s talk about the graphics, well not much to say about that. They’re okay I guess. Nothing special and nothing compared to the orgasmic graphics the latest E3 showed us with Halo 2, Doom 3 and Half-Life 2 but you can’t expect such a graphics in a game like this. I saw very few errors and in general they’re just plain okay. Nothing less, nothing more.
Now comes the bad part of the game, from now on it’s all downhill. Where shall I start, this game has so much suckitude it’s hard to know where to begin. Okay let’s start with the controls and the view-angels. The angels are fixed and I think they always tried to pick the most unhandy angel. Well they achieved succesfull. I always felt like I had no survey of the situation, but the controls where even worse. The controls aren’t very intuitive and they change together with the view-angels in the most unexpected way. I don’t know what it is but they just suck big time. Whenever you want to change you’re weapon it goes too slow and the buttons aren’t well placed on the gamepad.
But we haven’t discussed the gameplay. The gameplay is … present, but there ain’t much positive left to say about it. I don’t thing a single gamer on this planet would think it’s enjoyable. You’ll have to fight gang-members and other fella’s but you only have 2 different buttons to fight them, to make combos you have to use the left-trigger. When you knocked someone out you have to handcuff him and when you do it they show a little animation while your ass is getting kicked by the other gang-members. Personaly I had more fun count the pixels on my television than the playing the game. There’s no real challenge and doesn’t play smooth. You get knocked down by only one punch while the enemies are immortal till you handcuff them. But after all, who needs gameplay anyway?
Next item on the list: the engine, I allready said the graphics were okay, which is true but the levels are incredible small and the loading times are too long for such a small area. It happens frequently you unintentedly go to another level while fighting with an enemy, well the enemy wont follow you and when you return he’s gone.
The AI isn’t that intelligent, the enemies just run to you and try to knock you down. But they do it properly I haven’t discovered a bug on this issue.
This game was a nightmare to review, if you buy this game I’m going to hunt you down because of a violation of good taste. Do you want motivation to break the world-record gamepad-throwing, you can buy it but anyone who has some kind of intelligence and who is near this game I’d say: RUN BOY, RUN (unless you’re a girl, in that case: mail me!!)