Until I had removed the cellophane everything was looking quite fantastic because after all, I have been waiting for an exotic (cars and locations) racer ever since NFS:HP2. So, I was quite confident that it would provide me with what a man wants, what a man needs until … I opened the box. I immediately knew that it was not Christina Aguilera’s body but the over-tanned chick on the leaflet still looked pretty damn good in that transparent lingerie. However, as I fall for the eyes and smile and the leaflet only goes from thighs to throat, it was doomed to fail. It would have done so anyway after I read the slogan on top: “Gamen ist Geiler”. Well, I enjoy an exciting game as much as the next boy but it is very hard to believe that the silly nerd behind the racing-wheel (on the other side of the leaflet) preferred to sit in this when he could be sitting on that. Do notice however that, judging by his facial expression, somebody must have made him believe that this seat comes with a sat-nav which will take him right into pussy-paradise. (Jerk off quickly and do not order such a seat, it will get you nowhere! Do not let the reverse psychology fool you.)

Wiped the cum of your hand? Good me too, now scroll down so you can read the rest of this “review”. If a publisher is willing to pack such an ad with their game, then they won’t have too many moral issues about anything else either so I guess I landed in the filthy part of Germany after all. Still, Speed (read: the editor-in-chief) forced me to install the game anyway. After the copying of over three gigabyte was finished and I rebooted my computer, I was ready to launch World Racing 2. Although I chose full install (quicker loading times in the back of my head) the DVD was still used for some checking purposes that take too fucking long. If they want to prevent piracy then someone who paid fifty bucks for it should not suffer the consequences. It shows again how the publishers are money-mad-maniacs who devour innocent, little gamers by any means necessary.

The minimum requirements on the box are a load of bullshit, it begins to look like a game if you possess of twice that power. However, although the graphics look more refined on a heavier machine (every games does), the gameplay did not really improve. Everybody knows a Dremel right? Such a handy tool, after some time, must have look-alikes from extremely cheap brands but those machines can only rotate at three settings: slow, medium and fast. A decent Dremel on the other hand (not the one with sperm on it) has a slider which allows you to increase the rotating speed gradually from zero to max.

Let us question ourselves, could NFS:MW be an expensive Dremel (150 euros) and World Racing 2 is a real cheap one (20 euros), prices based on actual information. Are they indeed alter ego’s in a parallel marketing segment? Well, let’s try and find out. Steering in WR2 is like operating the speed-switch, one brute click at the time although I must say that the car-axles in WR2 have five settings. (I would not want to get sued over such a stupid detail!). Its graphics remind me of toys in a way that the twenty-euro-Dremel looks like a drilling machine in the series of Ficher Price toys for three year olds. The music and sound-effects were probably recorded with worn (2 days old) and new Dremel-variants so the two galaxies must have crossed? Wow, unbelievable that happens only every 7531 years! Now, does such a Dremel work? Yes, it surely does but so lousy that you can do it quicker by hand (interprete this the way you feel). However, there is one major difference between the two worlds: in gamingland both species are priced equally while in do-it-yourself land (I’m on a roll now, aren’t I?) some are more equal than others.